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How to Deal with Spousal Financial Abuse: Protect Yourself in a Challenging Situation

Spousal financial abuse is a form of domestic violence where one partner controls or exploits the other partner’s financial resources. This form of abuse can manifest in various ways, making it difficult for the victim to achieve financial independence or feel secure. Some common tactics include controlling access to bank accounts, where the abuser might not allow the victim to have their own bank account or insist on monitoring all transactions.

The overarching goal of spousal financial abuse is to gain power and control over the victim, making it extremely challenging for them to leave the relationship or achieve financial independence. Financial abuse can have long-lasting impacts, not only on the victim’s financial stability but also on their mental and emotional well-being.

There are five more commonplace signs of spousal financial abuse to be aware of:

  • Control over finances: One spouse controls all the financial resources and does not allow the other to have access or knowledge of the family finances.
  • Restricting access to money: The abusive spouse provides an allowance or only gives money for specific purchases, denying the other spouse access to bank accounts or credit cards.
  • Accumulating debt: The abusive spouse incurs debt in the other spouse’s name without their knowledge or consent, damaging their credit score.
  • Stealing money or assets: The abusive spouse takes money or property from the other spouse without permission, including cash, jewelry, or other valuables.
  • Sabotaging employment: The abusive spouse prevents the other from working or pursuing career opportunities, thereby limiting their financial independence.

Let’s now turn to how you can best protect yourself from and deal with spousal financial abuse.

Educate Yourself Financially

Take the time to learn about budgeting, saving, and managing your finances independently. Consider taking online courses, reading books on personal finance, or attending workshops to build your financial literacy. The more knowledge you have, the better equipped you’ll be to handle your finances without relying on your partner.

Secure Personal Identification Documents

Ensure you have access to your personal identification documents such as your Social Security card, passport, and driver’s license. Keep these documents in a safe place where only you can access them. Having control over these documents is crucial for proving your identity and accessing various services.

Open a Separate Bank Account

Open a bank account in your name only to start saving money independently. Choose a bank that offers good interest rates and low fees. This account can serve as your financial safety net, giving you the ability to save money that your partner cannot access.

Build a Support Network

Reach out to friends, family, or support groups for emotional and practical support. Having a strong support network can provide you with the encouragement and resources you need to break free from financial abuse. Support groups, both in-person and online, can connect you with others who have faced similar challenges.

Create a Safety Plan

Develop a detailed plan for where to go and how to support yourself if you need to leave the relationship. This plan should include safe places to stay, important contacts, and access to financial resources. Consider packing an emergency bag with essentials such as clothing, medications, and important documents.

Document Abuse

Keep thorough records of any financial abuse, including restricted access to money, forced signing of documents, or threats. Documenting these instances can be crucial if you need to take legal action or seek protective measures. Keep these records in a secure location where your partner cannot find them.

Access Community Resources

Look for local organizations that provide assistance to victims of domestic abuse, including financial abuse. These organizations can offer a variety of services such as emergency shelter, counseling, legal aid, and financial planning assistance. Many communities have hotlines and websites where you can find information on available resources.

Consider Counseling

Seek therapy or counseling to help rebuild your confidence and plan for a future without financial control. A professional counselor can provide you with the tools and strategies to cope with the emotional impact of financial abuse and support you in developing a plan to achieve financial independence. Counseling can also help you address any underlying issues that may have contributed to the abusive situation. It can be a critical step in healing and moving forward.

Seek Legal Advice

Consult with a New Jersey divorce lawyer to understand your rights and options regarding financial abuse. A lawyer can help you navigate the legal aspects of separating your finances from your partner and provide guidance on how to protect your assets. Legal advice can also help you with issues such as restraining orders or custody arrangements if needed. If you need to talk to an attorney, call the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen, at (201) 845-7400 for a free consultation.

 

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